You Know You're A Parent When... it's 'Gradulation' Time :)

Aloha,

It’s been seven months since I’ve posted one of my You Know You’re A Parent When… series, so now that I’m (about) done with WIP#1 edits, what better than to jump back and offer a few warning signs tips to “in-coming” parents – or remind those with children why we have no more are blessed.

You know you’re a parent when…

...You've missed naptime by ten minutes, and the Zombies have attacked the 100-Acre Wood...



No, leave me. It's too late for Pooh... Go! Save the Butt Paste

 

 

Stop, I say, STOP!!!

...You appreciate No. 2 Son for his optimism...
 
 








... but are there for the aftermath

Ahem, Carry On...

 

 

...You clean the patio windows to perfection, (sweating like a Zoomba dancer using illegal narcotics in the noon sun,) so the kids can use their new pack of Crayola Window Crayons… (I don’t make this stuff up, folks – well, except for the Zoomba dancer thing!)
 

...You bring the kids to the new dinosaur exhibit at the Bishop Museum and the first words out of No. 1 Son, (who's since grounded until he is 40 - at least) are, "Look Papa, it's a Dinosaur Papa - he has no hair, too!"

Earliest Known SIGGY :)

 

...You finish a well-listened to (including good eye-contact) “Stranger Danger” conversation, only to see No. 1 Son immediately run to the next person walking in the park and ask, “What’s your name called?”

 

....You remember to sing (or at least hum) the words to Cat in the Cradle in the midst of a ridiculous multi-tasking moment when:

No. 3 Son cries ‘cos he threw his pacifier under the couch (accompanied by the usual “Oh ohhhh…”)

No. 2 Son asks again for his soup, which you are cooking (while trying to move the couch.)

and...

No. 1 Son wants to share something important (about ice melting) that’s really important – to him.

...You wander up the stairs, only to discover rumors that the 100 Acres Wood has been freed by Rebel Children are unsubstantiated.

I smell like Pooh

I can't smell anything..

 

  

...You and your spouse happily manhandle bring the kids to somewhere (LOUD) like Ruby Tuesdays on a Friday at 3 p.m. for “date afternoons.”

 

 

And finally... when you're told about "Gradulation", it becomes the coolest word of the day.

 

(Courtesy of our 5-year-old who "Gradulated" from Kindergarten this week.)

 



Dude, can I borrow the car keys now?

 

 

 

W.R.I.T.E update & Best/Worst Movie Remake BlogFest (Reviews by the Valley Girls)

Aloha,

Before my oxy-moronic one-of-a-kind, unique take on Alex’s “Best/Worst Movie Remakes” BlogFest, a quick note on my Writers Retreat Island-Time Escape, here in Honolulu Dec. 6-8, 2013.

Anyone Need Rescuing in December? 

 I had this crazy idea of paying it forward for my fellow writers by organizing a FREE weekend of fun writing activities, etc., here in Honolulu, Hawaii.

You can find full details, including a provisional schedule here.

While not earth-shattering, the latest news is that W.R.I.T.E is still ON.

There’s been a lot of interest, and I understand that getting to Hawaii is the issue for most people, but if you’re perhaps like Nancy LaRhonda Johnson, who plans to attend while on vacation, I’d love if you could join us.

                                                                             ###

OK, so onto the best and worst Movie Remakes, co-hosted by the indomitable Stephen Tremp, the indestructible Father Dragon and the irresistible Livia Peterson.

I’ve chosen two best and two worst – ‘cos I couldn’t chose one best and one worst. It was too hard, which made me wonder is this the best or the worst BlogFest?

(See that play on words –yahh boo! – Man, when I grow up, I realy want to be a righter.)

Most will at least know the titles, so my reviews will be short, sweet (and sponsored by the local chapter of the Valley Girls.)

I was Clueless, but if you need more info on each movie, the link will bring you to Wikipedia.

Totally First Best: 3:10 to Yuma (2007) versus the original, also a Western, which was made in 1957.
My Review: I love the coincidences in that both movies were Westerns… that’s awesome, like.

 

Second Best and duh, still a great movie: The Birdcage (1996), versus the original comedy, La Cage aux Folles (1978)

My Review: Like, I enjoyed The Birdcage, but they talked a bit funny in the original (and I’ve heard the movie was a partnership between two European countries, but I’m not sure who this Franco-Italian director fellow is, like.)

Totally First Worst: Planet of the Apes (2001) versus the original, which came out in 1968.
My Review: The original scared the bejaysus out of me for years (as an impressionable child, I refused to watch further episodes of Curious George. The remake… nahhh. That was crap, like.)
 

Second Worst, but still way, way bad: The Pink Panther (2006) versus the original, and still, like my favorite movie, the co-named The Pink Panther (1963)
My Review: Again, the coincidence of the names got me, definitely, like, for a few minutes.
I had high hopes for Martin Sheen
(What?)

Oh, sorry, Steve Martin, but there is only one King Panther, and his name was Peter Sellers, baby. He was way cool. Definitely.

There are Bonus BlogFest Boints, er points, for listing my best/worst song remake, but duh... everything from the '80s will always remain brilliant. Why remake a classic, like?

For example, I triple-dog dare you *not* to hum along with this ditty by Chris de Burgh, which is set to scenes from Pretty Woman :)

‘Nuff said. I’m off to go chill with my rad Yuppie amigos.

Like. Totally.

 

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5 ways I LOVE the dog-gone, sometimes annoying, but always *free*, good ol' USA

Aloha,

During the A to Z challenge, (is that a spelling Bee? :) Rebecca Bradley posted a list of five ways to be happy here.

She then happily decided to meme others.

Annalisa Crawford was very sweet to pass it forward last week.

Annalisa, you made me happier than a broke Irishman in a Friday night bar crowd who discovers (at last call) a forgotten $20. (His happiness is tempered as he ponders three things – for he may choose only one.) Another few pints; a taxicab… or a battered sausage, curry chicken pie and a staggeringly long, (but full) walk home.

(I'll wait while the non-Yorkshire readers figure that out :)


Anyhow, here’s how the Happy Meme works:

Offer a shout out to the Happy One who tagged you.
Then, list my five happy ways.
Tag five more.

I'm tagging some of the happiest people I know:

Martin Willoughby

Morgan Shamy

Johanna Garth

Mark Means

Tammy Theriault

 
For *my* five choices, I’m skipping family and Hawaii - I know how blessed I am to have them – and be here.)

However, after a few hours of research and many tears (thanks Annalisa!), here’s five things and a related YouTube clip for each one) that always render me happier than a pig in fresh poop:

1. People watching at an airport arrivals lounge.

Especially when it's a service member returning from deployment who spots and greets their loved ones.

 

2. Driving across the United States.

In the last seventeen years, I’ve done so six times and can’t wait to do it again.
On my journeys I:

·         Rode a 1984 Pontiac Sunbird convertible, my first car, from Key West, Fla., to Orlando, and later moved to Chicago, Ill.

·         Relaxed in a new Mustang GT while I drove from Chicago to Newport Beach, Calif. Stopped for speeding once, I got a $50 ticket from a cop in the Navajo jurisdiction.

(Is it just me, or how cool is it to "earn" a citiation from the Navajo Nation :)

·         Moved with my new bride (a week after our wedding) from San Diego to Central Florida. (We drove two cars and connected via walkie-talkies "in a pre-text world" ;)

·         Man-handled a U-Haul (sure…those slidy bucket seats are comfortable and don’t bounce much) from Long Beach, Calif., to San Antonio, Texas.

·         Solo-chauffeured our two dogs from CA to TX and spent several nights in various, interesting Motel 6’s where I walked first one pound puppy – and then the other – to avoid pet policy penalties.

·         ROAD TRIPPED! from Newport, Rhode Island to San Diego with my Uncle Tom, a retired geologist from Holland. Ugh, I *never* want to see another rock in my life!

 

 

3. Lee Greenwood’s God Bless the USA.

Toward the end of its morning show, the local AM station plays this song once a week.

 

By the end of the song, I’m always bawling while emptying the dish machine or making fresh pancakes for the boys.

 

(It’s quite embarrassing, really, and I hope the front door bell never rings.)

 

But, I can’t help it.

 

I’m proud that I was “born and reared” in Ireland, but I’m so proud that I chose to become an American.

 

 

4. Thanksgiving.

I landed in the U.S. in 1996, but never “got” this holiday until 2001.

 

I was at a pre-Thanksgiving party with a few runner friends.

 

The guy next to me asks what I’m doing for Thanksgiving?

 

Formerly a restaurant manager, I always worked Thanksgiving so the “locals” could enjoy family time. My current restaurant closed for the holiday. I had no plans.

 

The guy flipped open his phone, talked to someone and handed me the phone.

“Hello. Is this Mark?”

“Yes, ma’am…?”

“Brian tells me you’ve nowhere to go for Thanksgiving..,”

“Well, yes, but that’s OK. I’m planning a quiet d—”

“Mark, dinner’s at three. Brian will give you the address. We’ll see you then.”

“But…”

(Dial tone.)

Of course, I had the most wonderful experience and Thanksgiving is now my favorite holiday.

(And to close that circle, here's this :)

 

5.      Voting.

So many people don’t care, but oh my, it’s so important.

And, if you’ve ever wondered why, watch this.

Go on.

You don't have to.

However, I do double-dog dare you to watch this six-minute video.

It's not going to harm or hurt you.

I ask only because it's my right.

And, my fellow American citizens, it's your right to do as you wish.

How awesome is that. I love this place :)

 

God bless the USA.